The Pre-Korea War

Count down 10 days till departure:

"So, are you getting excited to leave for Korea?"
"So, are you like really nervous?"
"You don't speak any Korean? Isn't that going to be a problem?"

To answer the questions in one mass message, I don't know. But isn't that the fun in what I am about to do? Shouldn't I feel uncertain of my future? My mom won't stop pleading with me to learn how to ask where the bathroom is in Korean. Like some how knowing how to say this will intrinsically imply that I know how to interpret the array of answers that will likely be thrown right back at me in Korean.
Uh everyday, every second my feelings about the next year swing like a pendulum. One moment I have an elated feeling of excitement and anticipation. Similar in many ways to the feeling you get when you are riding on a roller coaster over the initial apex of the first hill. Then the next second my stomach turns in fear of having to exhaust myself constantly with the boundless energy it will take to translate broken English for the next year. Or even worse, I fear that I won't be a good teacher. Then I remind myself that no matter what the outcome is I can't control it. That and I will be a much happier person if I try, at least in the first couple weeks, to focus only on those things which I can control. Then if I am lucky maybe things will fall on the side of good fortune without me having to try relentlessly to produce those outcomes.
I am excited, don't get me wrong, and I don't have some sort of ethnocentrism when it comes to living in a new country and learning to communicate with others. I am just being frank and that is what I hope to continue to do while writing this blog. I am a 24 year old ambitious woman who in light of a lot of unfortunate "outcomes" I decided to stop the pattern and make my life work for me. What better way to do this than to go out there, get the education I need to succeed, and live my life helping others while making new and memorable experiences for myself. One of my all time favorite quotes by Sir Winston Churchill best summarize my determination in South Korea.
"Twenty to twenty-five! These are the years! Don’t be content with things as they are…. Don’t take no for an answer. Never submit to failure. Do not be fobbed off with mere personal success or acceptance. You will make all kinds of mistakes; but as long as you are generous and true, and also fierce, you cannot hurt the world or even seriously distress her. She was made to be wooed and won by youth. She has lived and thrived only by repeated subjugations."
One Love,
Erin