Things to know before you go

Wallonian Château

     My aunt asked me to give advice to a pair of young women (friends of hers) who will be vacationing in Europe in the near future. Not that I am, by any means, an authority on the whole of Europe, but after living in Belgium for the last nine months I can at least compile a list of a few do's and don'ts. Not just for tourists, but also for expats planning to move abroad to Vlaanderen (the Flemish region of Belgium). I make this distinction because I found it very difficult to obtain information about Belgium from other American/English expats who weren't referring to life in Brussels. I am sure Brussels is a fantastic place to live, but to me it represents the culture of typical Vlaanderen towns, like life in NYC is to living in middle America. For most, Brussels is where they will end up due to all the EU, UN, and NATO related jobs. Life where I live, in a small town on the border with the Netherlands, things operate without a lot of the same comforts for expats.

Gent

     Luckily, throughout Vlaanderen "most" people speak a decent amount of English and it doesn't end there (they also speak French, German, Spanish, Italian, and even some Turks, as well as plenty of languages). Being such a small, yet central nation, Belgium has learned to adapt. So on the other hand Flemish Belgians appreciate it, but don't expect it, but APPRECIATE IT (if you catch my drift), when you speak their language as well. I don't think that most English speakers have the capacity to empathize with the frustrations faced by non native English speaking cultures. Therein, lies some of the annoyance that other countries have towards us. Tip: Learn at least a few words before you arrive. Here is a good youtube channel that I used when I was learning the basics. It is incredibly easy with the use of the internet and a few flash cards to not fall into that aforementioned category. You will definitely be well received, even if you make mistakes.

     Belgians proudly refer to themselves as the real Burgundians, which means they don't f**k around when it comes to eating, drinking, or entertaining. The level of care and detail that the average Belgian puts into a meal is shocking to most Americans. I should know, when my husband lived in America and would cook for my family or friends every meal was "amaaaazing". Vlaanderen has TV programs dedicated to competing over who can best entertain a group of strangers. Being Belgians, they have no reservations about openly criticizing a less than Michelin-star-level meal. Actually it makes me laugh now that I look back because if you really hit it out of the park they won't go crazy with the adulations, but you make one mistake and the typical Belgian eye rolls and raised eyebrows are abundant. Americans must learn not to take these facial expressions too seriously. Generally it just means that they want to have a laugh about it, but I am still learning not to feel insulted. Beyond entertaining, the Burgundian lifestyle invades even the smallest facets. Belgians don't walk around while eating.  When they buy street food (frites for example) they take a seat on a bench or wall and share with their friends. It even goes so far as to they don't like to move around while drinking. When I came to Belgium I was confused to why there wasn't a coffee shop where I could buy a coffee to go. Everywhere, in my town, when you order a coffee it is served on plate accompanied by sugar, milk and a cookie or chocolate.  For Belgians drinking coffee is equivalent to drinking a beer. You sit down to enjoy the experience and never rush. Here is the tip: If drinking, even a coffee, is supposed to be a pleasant and lingering venture then share with thy neighbor. If you sit down in a café (Belgian bar/coffee house) and start talking to the person next to you or go out with a group of friends, buy a round of drinks for your acquaintances. Or reversely if someone offers you a drink, accept it, and return the favor by buying the next round. Always say saunté, proost, or gezondheid and lift your glass, before drinking the drink from your friend. It doesn't matter which one, just choose one to say and they will be impressed. This is something that is not common in American unless it is for a special occasion. If you are worried about your wallet, don't. In the end it all get's paid back in full and you will have a great time chatting it up with an array of lively people. Let's just say that if you choose not to do this, you will be thought of as American (and not in a good way). I don't want to ramble on about this subject, I easily could, but there is one other funny factoid about Burgundian lifestyle. Most Belgian cars don't have drink holders. I wasn't kidding when I said they don't like to move while drinking.

So many tasty beers to choose from.

      So you have learned a few key phrases, sat down at a café and ordered a "pintje" (tap beer) for your new Belgian friend. Next tip: be careful to not to drink too much and become noisy and obnoxious. One time while out to dinner in a rather large rib house, my husband pointed out to me how quiet it was. Not eerily quiet, but no one was so loud that you could here their conversation from your table. I can remember plenty of times when you go out to eat in America and there is a group of (sorry to say) women drinking together enjoying the weekly lady's night out. After the second or third round of drinks the women seem as though they are competing with each other to see who can talk louder or produce the most ear-splitting cackle. Yes, everyone has a little too much to drink from time to time, especially when on vacation. Just try to keep the noise level in check. Next to Russians, Americans are considered to be some of the most boisterous tourists around (just sayin').
 
There are a lot of other tips that don't need an explanation:

*Fair warning these tips are to the best of my knowledge, if there is an error or it is not explained clearly then don't murder me. I know that a lot of these explanations are not compelely accurate but for the sake of someone who is visiting for a few days or has just arrived this seems to be the easiest way to explain Dutch (the language) and Belgian culture. For those who want to really invest in learning everything properly, please enroll in your local ISBO for Dutch classes*

• In most areas of Vlaanderen, shops and stores are closed on Sunday and may even close early on Saturday. In Belgium you cannot buy aspirin or other common OTC medicines in the grocery store or gas station. You must go to a "Apotheek" or pharmacy. They usually have a large green cross in front of the store. There you must ask for what you need. OTC medicines usually don't need a Rx. Birth control you do. They might be willing to give you one month in an emergency situation, but eventually you must provide an Rx from a doctor (I think it must be from a Belgian doctor, I am not sure if an American script would work). This means if you feel sick on friday night it can become difficult to get aspirin or other OTC's on Saturday or Sunday. Plus I think you have to pay more. I brought a bottle of Ibuprofen and other OTC meds with me, as I do anywhere in the world. Also if you are looking for baking soda, this is where you buy it. It is called "zuiveringszout".
• You don't have to tip. If it looks like it is a student working during their break you can always round up or give an extra euro tip, but normally a tip is not expected. 
• a.u.b. means alstublieft.
  This has two meanings "please" (Één pintje a.u.b. = One beer please) or "here you go". For example, when you give money to the cashier you would say "a.u.b" as you hand him/her the money. They will say "a.u.b" when they give you your change or when they serve you something (beer, food, etc).
• Eet smakelijk = bon appétite = enjoy your meal. I have had random strangers say it to me when they see me carrying home food from a restaurant. haha. Typically, they say it when you are about to eat whether they served you the food, are sitting close to you, or generally see you about to eat then, eet smakelijk!
• "j" sound like our "y", so "je" is pronounced like "ye" as in "yellow". "je" /"jij" means "you". "Heb je honger?" literally means "Do you have hunger?" or  "Are you hungry?".
• "k" is hard. For example "coffee" is written as "koffie" and more or less is pronounced the same way. 
• In the Netherlands to say "goodbye" typically is "dooi" which is pronounced as "dooey"*. In Belgium they say a lot of different things but typically in café or store you can say "salutjes" (remember the "j" is pronounced like a "y") or "dag" (the "a" in "dag" is pronounced like when your doctor tells you to say "aaah" it does not have the "a" sound similar to the english word "bag").
• Belgium has an excellent public transportation system. If you are going to use the buses more than once I recommend buying a "Lijnkaartje" (De Lijn is the name for the bus system in Vlaanderen, kaartje means small card) They are 9 euro and you can buy them at convenience stores ("nachtwinkel" at night), "benzinestation" (gas station), or if you can find one the "Lijnwinkel" (the store/offices for the bus system). This cuts the price of a bus journey down buy 40% compared to paying when you step on the bus. Just stick your card in the machine in front of the driver and say where you want to go plus a.u.b. For example, "Gent a.u.b" or "stationstraat a.u.b".
• Taxis are expensive and sparse so stick to trains, trams, and buses. 

Key phrases:

• Where is the...                 = Waar is de/het....
• Bathroom                        = toilette or W.C. (pronounced "way say")
• Train station                    = treinstation
• Bus station                      = busstation
• Airport                            = luchthaven
• Hotel                               = hotel  
• I am from America          = Ik kom uit (sounds like english word "out") Amerika.    
• I don't speak dutch          = Ik spreek geen Nederlands (see this link for an pronunciation help)
• Do you speak English?   = Speekt u engels?
• Can I have a coffee         = Één koffie a.u.b.
• Can I have...                   =  ... a.u.b
• beer (tap)                        = pintje
• beer (bottle)                    = flesje
• glass                               = glas
• wine                               = wijn
• red                                  = rood/rode (pronounce the "e") 
• white                              = wit/witte (pronounce the "e")
• sandwhich                      = boterham 
• How much is it?             = Hoeveel?
• the bill/tab                      = rekening
• Thank you                     = Dank u wel

* if you are visiting don't worry too much about which to use (i.e. rood v. rode) and also with

"het v. de (waar is de/het...)" just choose one if you are not sure.

• right                       = rechts  
• on the right side     = op de rechterkant
• left                         = links  
• on the left side       = op de linkerkant
• straight                  = rechtdoor

Spreekt u engels?

If you can get your smartphone or even a normal phone, "jail broken" before you leave, you can purchase a SIM card once you land and use your phone here. It is best to get it jail broken through your provider, especially if you have an Iphone. I didn't and my phone locked up when I tried to update it. Also, if you have a smart phone that you can use wifi ( pronounced wee fee here) is pretty common and you can access it in most cafés and hotels/hostels. Download the google translate app before you go. It is not always accurate, but can definitely not hurt to have. Other good apps to have when traveling in Europe are: 

• Spotted by Locals. You can download a city map (for free) that you can zoom in and out of on your phone without using wifi. If you pay the extra 5.00 euro you can get the map loaded with suggestions from locals of cool places to go.
• De Lijn. This is the app for the bus system in Belgium. The website can be in English but I think the app is only in Dutch or French. If you don't know enough of either, then use the map feature on your smart phone or laptop and set it to public transportation, the bus icon. (I have a Iphone 3 and I think it is google maps that I use).
• If you are staying for a while then I recommend the apotheek app. It lists all the pharmacies in your area and which ones are open. See above post about pharmacies in Belgium.
• USE-IT.TRAVEL This isn't an app but it is an excellent website for visiting major European cities. You can print out their map at home or if you visit the major cities, i.e. Brussels, you can pick one up from their offices. It provides info about everything you would need and it won't be the cooker cutter crap that Lonely Planet or Fodors will tell you to do.
• Her Packing List. This is a great website that offers all sorts of travel suggestions, and as the name implies, packing lists for women. Which my only suggestion as far as packing goes is to bring a change purse. Everything below 5 euro is coins. It can become heavy and a hassel if you just stuff it in your pocket. But that is probably on one of the suggested lists.

     As a reminder, this is all my own opinion after living in a pretty typical small to average size town. Of course in Antwerp, Gent, *Brugge and *Brussels (*especially) you will see a lot of exceptions to these tips. Even in these bigger cities, keep in mind that just because other tourists behave in a certain way doesn't make it more acceptable. Your cultural awareness and sensitivity will not go unnoticed.

Don't end up asleep at your next nightclub